Saturday, February 27, 2010
restless boredom
i wonder what it really means to be restless and bored. i suppose one can be truly bored if they have been cooped up in the house for several days. that is certainly not always the case though, is it? i have a sneaking suspision that in my case it most likely means i am really avoiding doing something or facing some task that i have an issue with. take tonight for instance, i have been home since late afternoon doing nothing but watching tv, sighing, snacking, looking for something good to eat in the kitchen and sighing some more. i should be cleaning up all the boxes of stuff still stacked in my room and in my spare room. i moved in here 3 months ago and moved stuff from storage 2 months ago, stacked it all up in the rooms and have only unpacked or gone through maybe one quarter of it. it bugs me and it is on my mind all the time yet here it sits, bugging me still. there i sit in the living room thinking about it but choosing to be "bored and restless" and do nothing but stare at the tv. well, i guess i sort of answered the question then haven't i? now, if i could just make myself change it. ah, no i will stay here writing for a bit longer and then probably go watch some more tv and think about how bored i am. it is so true that we humans are so programmed when we are young by people and circumstance, we just keep all these self limiting thoughts and habits without realizing it. i am working on changing mine so maybe in a few weeks i won't get "bored" i will get busy instead and clean up all these boxes.
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